Loosing the Synergy

I've worked in the current company for 5 months plus now. For the first 3 months, I have to admit that I really enjoyed chilling around office while learning about work. I've been to industrial sites, did small assignments and I am proud to say while chilling in the office, I still deliver the performance. Not sure how my superior felt about it but I think in general, I've gained a lot.

But lately, I find myself being very directionless. I don't see how the task will actually help to develop me to the extent acceptable to my requirement. I just felt like an ambitious person being held back down.

I have great superiors, they are friendly, easy going and give me the freedom; on the route I wanted to do; meaning to say I can plan my own development... but question is how do I do so?
Damn, there's so much in my head but in brief, I'm kinda lost now.

If this is to last longer, I afraid to say I will be loosing the synergy and what is holding me back from doing the right thing (i perceive) is my liabilities and current financial commitments.

So... damn, I'm hanging and stucked...